As of lately...

Holy cannoli. I am officially the worst blogger ever. Life happens, I tell ya. And when it happens like its happened for me, I guess blogging becomes the last thing on the list. It is now on my list of things to do...I love writing this blog. I love sharing my thoughts, ideas and my life for whoever wants to read. But first let me catch you up a little...

So my last blog was sometime in February. But lets go back a little further to November. I had noticed one of my boobs was getting bigger than the other and it was painful. I don't know how well you know your body, but I know mine really well and I know my boobs have always been the same size. So I went to my doctor, she sent me to a general surgeon who then sent me to have a mammogram done and an MRI. After the mammogram, they found nothing but still had some concerns. So they had be do a full body cancer screening. On February 17th, my doctor called me and told me I had cervical cancer. Wow. That was a shock. Telling my mom was the worst. She was in such shock and very quickly I learned that no one knew what to say. Some people actually avoided talking to me on the phone because they didn't know what to say. So within a few wees, I started radiation treatment. Those are really fun. NOT. It could have been a lot worse but it was still awful. I spent 3-5 days a week laying in bed watching movies with Aven. She was such a trooper. I went through 6 radiation treatments and that did the trick. I was very early stage 1 which was wonderful news. I'm still able to have children and my doctor said the chances of cancer returning are less than 5%.

While finishing up my radiation treatments, I noticed that I was still feeling a lot of breast pain. So I called my doctor and they scheduled me for another mammogram. Nothing turned up. So they sent me to have the MRI done...which I hadn't actually done the first time they told me to back in November. Sure enough, a lovely spot showed up on the MRI and they sent me over for a biopsy. A few weeks later I had a lumpectomy to remove the cist. Turns out I have too much estrogen being produced in my body and it causes these cists and tumors. Eventually and sooner rather than later, I will have to have a hysterectomy to be totally done with all cists and tumors and hormone related cancers.

So there you have it. I totally planned on 2012 being the fresh start year. Nothing bad could happen. But the Lord obviously saw it another way. I don't know how much stronger he wants me to be but I guess I will just keep working hard at being the strong woman he clearly wants me to be. Faith, family and friends have gotten me through these last few months. And now I'm praying for some smooth sailing. Thank you to all of you who have known about this and have had me in your prayers. It means more to me than you will ever know. The power of prayer is so strong. So thank you! I promise to get better at the blogging thing...I've been so good in the past!

Xoxo.

Oops.

I looked at my blog today and realized I have written a single thing since Aven's birthday. Oops. Time just gets away from me. Well Aven is two now! Her vocab is growing every day! She says so many things and even tells a few short stories. My personal favorite is the story of Nemo getting eaten by a shark. I don't know where the story came from because in the movie, Nemo doesn't get eaten by a shark. Oh well though, its Aven's story, she can tell it however she wants. She is on the whole picky eater thing now though which just makes me so mad. She has always been such a good eater...and all of a sudden she wants nothing. I'm sure its just a phase...it better be. Aven is sleeping in her own bed though and that in itself is a miracle. She lays right down at 8:30, gives me a kiss and goes to sleep. She still wakes up a little during the night. She will get out of bed and come into my room. But I just walk her back to her bed, tuck her back in and she's asleep within seconds. I do miss sleeping without her wrapped around me but it does make for a better night sleep. Now if I could just get her to sleep through the night. Oh well, I'm just so happy to have her in her own bed!

In mama news...I signed up for Tough Mudder a few weeks ago. If you haven't heard of Tough Mudder, check it out on youtube. Its crazy. And I am crazy for signing up. But I felt I needed a little or big something to feel really excited and confident about. I have a little less than six months to get my booty into tip top amazing shape. I'm learning to become a runner...I've never liked running but I've always wanted to be a runner. So right now I'm working on building up my miles. I need to be able to run atleast seven miles, but my goal is ten. I will be doing the Tough Mudder in Lake Tahoe in September! So if anyone wants to join in on the fun...let me know!

This next weekend is a huge milestone for me. I will be taking my first weekend trip away without Aven. Yikes. It kind of makes me sad, but I know we are both ready. I will be going to LA for 3 nights/4 days and I am so excited! I'm excited for the beach, the warm weather, and for the really awesome company in which I will be spending my time with. I know I fully deserve a little time away. I know I will miss my little lovebug like crazy but she will have so much fun with Grama, Great Grandma and Aunie Nyn.

So about this amazing weather? I don't know what its like outside of California but here the sun has been shining and last week the temp was in the low 70's. Crazy and amazing! I even dug out some summer clothes just so I could have a few bright colored peices to freshen up my closet. And of course Pinterest is just buzzing with cute outfits for the spring and summer. Here are my finds...

Pretty cute! Can't wait to take some of my ideas down to LA this weekend and rock them out while shopping, dining out and playing on the beach!

Well that is what's new here with us. Sun is shining, Aven is talking up and a storm and I'm running my booty off. Love it!

Xoxo!

Happy Birthday Aven.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY SWEET AVEN JUNE!

A mother's love.

On Wednesday, my little Aven June will be turning 2. I'm still in shock over this whole thing. Like when did she grow up and become a toddler? It feels like its been maybe a year since I gave birth to her...when did the other year fly by? It's just so crazy to me. And then I think of all that has gone on in the last two years and I realize why I am always so tired. Seriously...I could fall asleep right now...mid sentence.

Aven is such an amazing little girl. She is hilarious, sweet, sassy, devilish, creative, beyond adorable, smart (almost too smart) and just such a little lover. She gives the best hugs, the sweetest kisses and her laugh is just enough to make you bust up laughing as well. That little girl can melt the heart of a complete stranger. Aven brightens even the darkest of days. Having been through this last year, I can honestly say that Aven has made me laugh and smile even when I thought nothing could put a smile on my face. She is my little rock. I can't even remember life before Aven. And when I really think about it, I don't think I was every truly living before Aven. I think you really start living when you get the chance to love someone with every little peice of your heart. I thank God everyday for giving me Aven. She is my every dream come true. For years before I got pregnant, I had dreams of a little girl who had blonde hair and blue eyes. And as I have watched Aven grow over the last two years, there is no doubt in my mind that she is the little girl I was dreaming of. She is the answer to my prayers and she gives me strength that I never knew I had. I love her with all my heart.

I love you Aven. Happy Birthday my little Jelly Bean.

Rain rain go away.

Aven's birthday is next week! My little sweet pea will be 2! We are having her birthday party this week and she chose a Minnie Mouse Clubhouse theme. Luckily Party City had tons of Minnie Mouse stuff so we got lots of cute decorations. And I am making Minnie Mouse cupcakes! Pictures to come.

Well it is finally raining in California. I guess its a good thing...if we don't have any rain, there will be no lakes this summer which means no boating. But I still HATE rain and cold weather all together. I don't mind a good summer rainstorm...but nothing is worse to me than cold, wet weather.

Pinterest has a way of making me wish it was summer NOW! All the cute clothes, summer cocktails recipes. It all just makes me wants to skip on down to May and get summer started. So once again...here are my latest finds.

I love this dress. So cute and it looks comfy too.

This is still a cold weather look...but still...super cute and easy.

Awww...this is what I love. I love the yellow...and yes you guessed it...look at those boots!

These are just some crafty ideas I found...

Pretty sure there is like 5 old rakes in the garage. Paint it cute...and tada! Perfect for jewelry.

I love these papers...you can find them anywhere and they come in every color and pattern. Perfect for brightening up a wall or mantle.




And then a few "words to live by" ideas...

I'm a planner and the hardest thing that I am having to learn how to do is let go of my "planning" and let God take over. I have to trust that his plan is better than any plan I have for myself.

Lately...everything has been a "day by day" thing. I'm learning to allow things to get better day by day...but in the end I do hope my story means the world to someone else.

I just love this one...had to post it again.

OF COURSE!

Have a good weekend! Xoxo.

A little romance...

Maybe its because there is no romance in my current life, but lately I am finding the most romantic ideas on Pinterest. Seriously...way to rub it in Pinterest.

Outdoor wedding.

I love this song and I think it just shows how every couple is something special. A husband is something special for his wife and she is something special to him. So sweet.

I love mason jars...and I love candles. Love these!

This might be very romantic but its sweet. I'm the girl who is always there for everyone...I listen, I give advice, I'm always there for a lot of people. But sometimes when I need someone...I find myself all alone.

This little letter really got to me. I know that God has a special person picked out for each of us...but instead of racing to find that person and accidentally picking the wrong one, I think we (me) need to sit back and wait for God to reveal to us the perfect person that he has created for us. How romantic is that?

Once again...I love candles and I have HUNDREDS of wine corks. Perfect.

I would die for this kitchen...its as simple as that.

I love all the layers and different materials in this dress. So beautiful.

Ain't that the truth?

Is it possible? A somewhat romantic laundry room? I think so.

This is my favorite.

Ok enough with the romance. Here are some of my favorite looks for the week...

Aven would look so cute in this outfit!

I love it all. The boots, the jeans, the jewelry, everything!

Note to self...get another job to pay for obsession with cowgirl boots.

Have a happy week! Xoxo!